A Contextual and Theoretical Christmas

The seafoam christmas tree option

Traditionally, we’ve always put a tree up right after Thanksgiving. This year, I need to buy a new one. The previous tree was white and had yellowed to a urine tone. In the past, I was forced to buy either a “lifelike” traditional tree, or a white one. But if a tree is artificial, shouldn’t it look artificial? Isn’t that a tenet of modernism, truth in materials? Taking this argument to its logical conclusion, this points toward a colored Christmas tree.

Fortunately, today, companies like treetopia sell colored Christmas trees. If you want a pink tree, you are now not forced to buy just a sad two-foot Barbie tree. This is disturbing to guests, or to use in the office, unless you have a young daughter. Like a visitor from the Soviet Union walking into a supermarket for the first time, I’m overwhelmed by the choices. Pink, blue, orange, or seafoam: which color is best? With the magic of Photoshop, I simulated the tree in its environment. I’ve found this to be a good tool for picturing possible furniture, landscaping, and hair color. Some of you are probably screaming at your monitor, “No you idiot! None of the above! Bad taste! Bad taste!” But I counter with my adherence to modernist theory.

The pink christmas tree option

The seafoam christmas tree option

The orange christmas tree option

The blue christmas tree option

Tags: , , , ,

6 Responses to “A Contextual and Theoretical Christmas”

  1. marian bantjes Says:

    The seafoam looks pretty good, but I didn’t see that colour there.But that blue? Sean, it’s called “smurftastic”! How could you even consider that? The pink could be great, or it could clash with the wall. What about the lemon-lime? Or Tinkerbell silver? It’s kind of Disney! Myself, I’d get the gold tree. You Americans have all the fun.

  2. R Snyder Says:

    Lovely Christmas trees. I came across a post of yours from August of 09 I believe about Pat Prichard’s dish towels. The writer said something to the affect of her life being pathetic about being excited about a dish towel, but I think it is very lovely to be excited about a dish towel. They are beautiful illustrations and designs and I think it is best to be happy about a dish towel than many other things that bring fake happiness. So to the writer, I fully support excitement about the small things!

  3. Andrew Twigg Says:

    Definitely pink. Or maybe seafoam. But definitely pink.

    I’m really drawn to the lemon-lime sublime option the offer.

  4. Joe Says:

    My vote is for the Seafoam.

  5. Tim Says:

    This comment isn’t actually about this post — although, wouldn’t Modernism suggest that you must use a tree as the material for a Christmas tree? — but the comments are locked on your Unwholesome Desires post (http://www.burningsettlerscabin.com/?p=4359) and I felt like I must share.

    Not only have I made a specimen promoting ITC Garamond (http://www.behance.net/gallery/ITC-Garamond-booklet–poster/252360), but I’ve just released a font so similar to ITC Caslon X-Bold No 223 (www.timdonaldson.com/pyespa.pdf) that I thought I was looking at my own reflection when I saw it.

    I think I’m going to hell.

  6. Sean Says:

    Thank you so much! I love the Pat Prichard towels.